And We Can Find New Ways Of Living, Make Playing Only Logical Harm.
November 13, 2017
something strange happened. well again.
even tho the both of us were pretty hesitant about staying at the theater, its the only place that has working electricity. so we thought we should probably use that to our advantage.
so yesterday, we turned on all the lights in the building hoping that come nightfall, people would see it and we'd find more survivors. Jenny even picked up some flashlights from the hardware store across the street. thank god batteries still work. but anyway, we kept all the lights on and jenny and i waited near the entrance to see if anyone was going to show.
we kept the doors locked. i was/i think we both were a little conscious of what the man in the dumpster said. i think what he said was completely self induced bullshit, but nevertheless doesn't hurt to be careful. i did have the gun too, which btw, i'm not too happy i have but it's one of those times were its imperative to have some protection. i've never had to fire a gun before and hopefully i won't have to. hopefully i didn't just jinx myself.
eventually, before we knew it, it was 1:30am and no one had showed and i think we were both on the brink of sleeping. i told Jenny to get a quick nap but she insisted that we just take turns keeping watch. i, because i felt it was my sole duty to be the alpha male, took the first watch while she took a quick nap. she looked too tired so i let her sleep.
at around 2:45am i found myself nodding off. i looked up at the doorway and saw a man standing at the doorway knocking on the glass.
he seemed pretty panicked too, so i went up to him and put my hand around the gun in my pant pocket.
“who are you?” i asked him. he looked to be about thirty. beard, short hair, medium build. probably had an office job. just a little description.
“my name's Randy. you've got to let me inside right now”
“someone told me that things are-”
“listen, we don't really have the time to argue right now. you better let me in right now or you're going to die”
“Is that a threat?” holding the gun slightly tighter.
“what's your name?”
“Todd.”
“Todd, if you don't let me in not only am i going to die out here, so will you and that girl lying on the ground”.
i didn't have a choice, i had to let him in. even if he was wrong, i couldn't gamble.
i let “Randy” in and he kept his distance.
“well what do you want?”
“Todd, you need to turn out all the lights in this building”.
“What? why?”
“just do it trust me”.
I woke Jenny up and got her to help turn off the lights.
“do any of you have a computer or a-a laptop with you?” the guy asked. he was being a bit frantic now. something was up. it was making me edgy. Jenny was getting nervous too.
“yeah in my bag”. i took it out and gave it too him.
the guy quickly rushed us over to the managers office which was a bit weird to be in again. he placed the laptop in front of the office door and shut/locked the door.
“why did you put my laptop in front of-”
“Shh!”
silence.
we waited for 2 mins. for something to happen.
something did.
at first i didn't think i heard anything. but then i strained my ears for the slightest sound. i heard it. it was the lightest footsteps i had ever heard in my life. i definitely would've have been able to hear it if i hadn't been trying to listen so hard.
the footsteps stopped outside the door.
it was then that i heard the most bloodcurdling-fucking terrible noise i've ever heard in my life.
it was the sound of a hundred babies screaming in different tones and pitches. and it was so loud. the three of us were trying to plug our ears as hard as we could, it was the most horrible thing i've ever heard. it nearly made me want to stab out my eardrums.
it finally ended and then after five minutes. whatever they were, they were gone.
I've gotten five hours of sleep over the past four days. Been staying in the computer lab at the university. They won't come in here. It's the only place they won't come in. I couldn't sleep, they were constantly chasing me. Ryan was right, they won't stop. The lack of sleep is starting to make me think I'm losing my mind. My sanity is all I have left. They don't like computers. That's why I'm in the computer lab. I don't know why, but they don't like the computers. Every night they would just come and watch me through the glass, night after night. I put all the monitors up against the windows, and they don't go near them anymore. But I can still hear them moving about outside. Waiting. I need to get some sleep.
Yesterday, I helped Todd get the body out of the managers office. It took half an hour because we had to keep stopping. I nearly threw up a couple times.
When we got the body outside, we didn't really know what to do with the body. We wrapped it up and everything, we just couldn't find a place to put it. I'm ashamed to say, but we had to drag it...him, out to the dumpster outside the theater....
After going back inside, we didn't really say anything, for pretty much the whole night. Just had some food, got our beds made up and everything and went to sleep.
This morning, during breakfast, Todd started to say how it wasn't our fault that he did it and stuff, and I understand, he was just trying to make me feel better. I guess it did too. He also told me not to listen to what the guy said about "they" coming for us. I just nodded and told him I'd just forget it, but really, how can you? The guy was obviously not himself but still, it's a little scary to think about. People just coming and taking people away?
Maybe Todd was right, maybe I shouldn't think about it, it just seems to make thing's worse.
I don't think Todd is getting over what the guy said very easily either. I'm pretty sure he didn't sleep the whole night. And before going to bed, I noticed that Todd had grabbed the gun before closing up the managers office.
around noon after taking having our fill of the library and eating a quick lunch. Jenny and i headed off to find other people.
the first stop we took was a 711 convenience store to pick up some goodies. i took too many mars bars. but thats ok.
after that we decided to go and check out this movie theatre i'd never really gotten the chance to go to, called "The Cinemite!".....i know i thought it was a lame name too. Jenny says it's really nice tho, one of her "fav hang out spots" on the weekend.
i wasn't really expecting much when we got inside. it was small and looked barren....obviously. i started snacking on some stale popcorn when Jenny turned the main lights on for the lobby/concession/whatever area.........................
we both just kind of stood there, dumbstruck. the only building with working electricity. we decided to stay here for tonight, for obvious reasons.
while going through the theatre, Jenny heard some rustling in the managers office. something shuffling or something. the door was locked.
"hello?" i said while knocking on the door. after a few moments of silence, someone answered.
"what do you want?"
"we're just other, well....uh, survivors. My name's Todd, and my friend's name is Jenny. are you alright in there?"
.............
"hello? are you ok?"
"you need to leave".
"look, we're not gonna do anything to upset you or hurt you or anything, we're just looking for other people. we just want to talk to you. can you do that? just talk? please?"
.........................
the door opened. jenny and i slowly crept in. the office was a mess. papers, food, garbage and other things i'd rather not think about were in the room. the man that we'd been speaking to was against the wall. he was pale and dazed. most likely intoxicated.
he spoke when we came in.
"oh good, you're not one of them".
"what do you mean one of them?"
j:"what happened here?"
"i was staying here with my friend, Lou. he was my manager when i worked at the theater. i had only worked a week before it happened. Lou knew what to do when everything went wrong. he got the back up generator working in the basement, he went and got food, he put me to work. everything was working fine........and then.......two nights ago. in the middle of the night. he heard something. well......i heard it too. it sounded like a little girl...a little girl screaming. Lou went outside just to go and make sure. he said he'd be back in two minutes. i stayed up all night, and he, he didn't come back. he didn't come back because they got him. they tricked him and got him"
j:"they? are they? what are you talking about?"
the man started to get irate for no reason.
"don't play stupid you know what i'm fucking talking about! th-they took Lou away!"
"look just calm down, ok? what's your name"
"it doesn't matter. i'm not going to be here much longer. it's just a matter of time before they get me too".
"look i think you just need to-"
"they're coming for you too you know. you and her. there's really no point in running or hiding. they always get what they want"
"look....come with us, we'll get you some food, get our shit together, and see if we can find someone okay? everything's really....fucked up right now, a lot of stuff is going on and you might hear/see things that aren't really happening. its called post traumatic stress, everyone gets it to some degree. it's normal. no one is coming for you okay? everything's gonna be fine, we'll figure everything out, just...come to the lobby with me and jenny ok?........"
the man looked at my for a second, then randomly just started to start crying.
We left the apartment late today. Mainly because we slept in. Well, I slept in. I admit it, i was tired. It really wasn't too much of a big deal.
I had my little backpack with me and Todd had his little bag. It was really weird to be outside again. Everything is so quiet and dead. Its constantly overcast. Sunny days feel like a short lifetime ago.
We checked some cars that were just scattered on the street, nothing. Even peeked inside some peoples homes. Where the hell did everyone go? I mean, I understand people dying and everything, but where did the bodies go? Maybe they didn't die, maybe they were fine, got up and left Seattle because they felt like it. Unlikely.
A little over forty-five minutes outside, it started to rain again. So now we've currently taken refuge in the public library. It's not too bad I guess. Can catch up on some reading I never really got around to doing. I guess I've got the time.
Libraries have always creeped me out though. They always seemed to big, and quiet. Like it was a maze or something. I don't know, it's just me.
I find that I don't like looking outside anymore. Even in the daytime. It's not that its like "too painful" to look outside because of all the memories and everything. It's just, I don't know, too weird.
I don't want to sound really lame by getting into scary stuff. But it's like there's something out there. Maybe not even something, maybe it's a reason. Most likely a something. Something sinister. YES. Sinister is the perfect word to describe what I feel.
today/this evening will be mine/Jenny's last night in this stupid apartment.
while she wants to stay here, i simply cannot stand sitting in this stranded apartment building anymore. if i do, it might just drive me up the wall. plus i think we need to find other people.
it was a nice cozy little apartment while it lasted but i don't think i'm going to miss it as much as Jenny will.
you have to give credit to a girl like her. for a teenager thats had her life get turned completely upside down, she's coping ok. not great, but ok. it must be hard to realize that your never going to talk to your friends and family again. come to think of it, i'm not going to be able to either. i guess i haven't really been thinking about myself too much lately. probably just less painful to block out all those beautiful memories. i hope i'm coping alright.
i miss Lisa.
its been drizzling outside for the past half an hour. its refreshing to see the world still remembers how to do some things right. better then this stupid fucking overcast. well i guess its still like that outside, but i still welcome the rain.
i've got to go and pack some things. food, some clothes, laptop, all the essentials.
Thing's have been interesting the past couple of days. It's been nice to have someone to talk to for a change. Thing's are still hard, but it's better when you have someone else there to help you.
Todd is a really nice guy, and I'm glad he was there when I saw.....well, what I saw. I try not to think about it. Partly because it makes me feel like I'm half going insane.
But anyway, Todd's a good person, and I don't think I could ask for anyone else to spend time with. Well, other then my family, but that's obvious. Sometimes I try and tell myself that maybe they could be like me and Todd. That they're alright. I get excited and think of all the ways that I'll get to see them again.
One day, I'll go into the rec center, and I'll see hundreds of people there. Taking shelter. I'll be happy, because, people are okay. I'll look around, and in the far corner of the gym, I'll find my parents and my brother. They'll be there, okay. We were just separated. We'll talk about all the thing's that have happened and how everything's going to get better. Eventually, we'll go home, and fix up the house a little bit. Mom will make some Meat loaf, Dad will get the TV working, and I'll try and finish up some Math homework before Dinner's ready because the school's are opening soon. Everything will be back to normal.
But it's not.
Then comes the part where I start to cry, and I feel incredibly cold. I'm crying so hard my chest hurts and it's hard to breathe.
That's the reality.
Todd and I are getting things ready, because we're supposed to get on the move soon. I kinda like this apartment, it's very cozy. Todd doesn't seem to like it much, and he makes a good point. If we found each other, there's gotta be other people out there. Other survivors.
I'm just taking all the essentials. Well, and the laptop too. I took one from a room a couple apartments down. I don't think anyone's going to be using it anymore, and it's pretty nice. I still don't understand this whole internet thing. There are a lot of things that don't add up. But that's just the reality of things.
yesterday morning, i awoke to the sound of a scream. it was a young womans scream coming from the building beside me. i ran down the stairwell as fast as i could. not only because it was the first time i've heard someone's voice in days but because the person sounded like she was in trouble.
as i ran outside, i saw a young girl sitting in the middle of the street crying. i ran up to her to see if everything was ok. apperently she followed someone into the next building and when she got inside, she saw a forty year old man lying on the ground dead. the girl said that it looked like he shot himself.
i went into the building to see the body, and i can honestly tell you, i searched in every room on the first floor and there wasn't a single body, dead or living, the building. come to think of it, i didn't hear a gun shot. it definitely would have woken me up. the girl, Jenny, said she didn't remember hearing anything either.
i took her back up to my apartment so that i could help clean her up. she took a pretty nasty fall when she ran out of the building scared half to fucking death.
for the past day we've been swapping stories on the past couple of weeks. i told her about my job, Lisa, how i'm having trouble remembering things.
speaking of which.
that's one of the things i'm having trouble remembering, i'm pretty sure i've never met her before but i've got the strangest feeling i have. probably just saw her walking downtown or something and happened to past by. but it doesn't feel like that.
she doesn't seem to remember meeting me either.
Jenny stayed the afternoon and the evening, i let her take my bed while i slept on the couch. not that we did much sleeping, a large portion of the night we just talked. it's amazing what you say when you haven't talked to someone in so long. its quite a relief. i felt like i hadn't seen anyone in months.
maybe it has, who knows.
as for now, i'm making lunch. pbandj sandwiches. yum. gotta eat it while the bread's still relatively fresh.
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